High Blood Pressure

Well my husband just found out he has high blood pressure.  You would think he was the only one in the world that had high blood pressure.  I have had high blood pressure since at least the age of 18.  My daughter found out when she was 14.  My father found out at 18.  Its just something that runs in our family.  He was put on medication and told he has to stop using over the counter medication for his asthma.  Which is what I have been telling him for years.  Does he listen?  Of course not.  Now he says he is scared.  Now maybe he will start to take care of him self.  Only time will tell.

IGNORE BUTTON

I am still not that happy with my so called friend.  Some times she must really think I am stupid.  When you call someones cell phone you can tell several things.  First you can tell if they are on another call.  Second you can tell if their phone is off or the battery is dead.  Third and the most important you KNOW when they hit the ignore button.   I have told her this in the past but for some reason she doesn't get it.  After the whole pool thing you would think she would not do it again.  But she does.  I would rather her just not answer the phone.  At least that way I would think maybe she was in the shower or something. 

What is a friend?

My son got hurt at a friends house last night. I had to take him to the hospital.  He had blurred vision and pain. He was playing in their pool when he was hit in the face by a pool noodle. He is ok, he has scratches on his cornea. Someone was suppose to be watching the kids.  My son says he didn't see any adults there.  Not sure if they were there but not right at the pool.  But if you are watching the kids and you see kids hitting each other in the face, then an adult needs to say you can not do that.  My neighbor was not home when this happen and I was unable to reach her.  Her kids were there also.  What if something worst happen?  God forbid something happen to one of her kids and no one could get in touch with her.  Then to top off the whole evening she tried to say you know how your son can be.  If the situation was reversed I would be kissing her ass and offer to pay the bill.  Where is my so called friend when I needed her?

"Today Show"

I am so excited the "Today Show" is coming to my house to tape a segment for their show.  It will be with Joy Bauer.  She will be going to people's homes to help them with what ever food challenges they have. I am nervous that I will freeze up or look so terrible on TV.  I am doing this for all the right reasons.  I am hoping that doing this all in a public fashion I will lose weight and become a healthy human being.Slim and Scrumptious: More Than 75 Delicious, Healthy Meals Your Family Will Love

Our Trip

OK so we did our trip!  It was beautiful!!  We really had a good time.  No fighting no dirty looks. I tried my best to be careful what I ate, while we were away.  But I can not say I was perfect.  We meant people from Canada, and people that live very close to use.  Its a small world. We saw lots of deer, but no bears.  The deer must have been so use to people we were able to walk right up to it.  The mountains were so beautiful.  But when the fog rolled in while we were driving up the mountain that was a bit scary.  There were a lot of bicyclist, on the roads, which made driving even more difficult.  You never knew what was going to be around the bend.  I would love to go again.

Weight Watchers

Well I started Weight Watchers the last week of April.  The first week I lost 4.8 lbs.  Now one thing you need to know is that I went to a different spot to get weighed plus I was first weighed in the evening the second time was in the morning. Then the following week I went to the first spot got weighed and was told I gained .2.  Now I am so confused.  I think from now on if I cant go to the first place I will skip my weigh in that week.  I doing what they call is a point system.  I am allowed 25 points a day plus you get 35 flex points.  So far I have not used my flex points.  Some members feel you should use the flex points.  I have decided yet about that.  Every time you exercise you can receive points also.  My thoughts on that is if you use those points what is the sense of exercising.

Next weekend is the big trip!! I am nervous and excited at the same time. 

Playing Games

My husband and I started fighting this morning over stupid things.  The first was when he asked me if I was getting in the shower.  I said yes I need to get in first because I need to run out and do stuff before the party.  Then he yells at me that all I needed to say was yes.  Which deep down in side I knew that I needed to tell him that.  Maybe I should have said to him this morning that I need to run out before we leave for the party.  Then I hear him fighting with our son who is getting in the shower next.  So I scream at both of them to stop fighting.  That my husband should get in next.   Think problem is solved.  NOOOO!  I rush to get ready and where is my husband out side washing my car.  Well guess who can not go any where.  Before I go out and say anything to him I take a deep breath and pour on the sweetness. So I ask how long will you be and he gave me a dirty look.  Then I say I need to run out before the parties.  He then says three hours.  I then say I guess we wont be able to go then.  He says good. I go in the house and try to calm down but can't.  I go back outside and calming say take your time cause we really  dont want to go to parties our son wants to make plans to go fishing.  He says ok tell him to go ahead.  So a little upset I go in and cancel both parties.  About 20 mintues later he comes walking in saying you can go get what you need for the party now.  Of course I tell him I canceled so I don't need to run out.  He dosen't understand why I did that.  He tells me how I have problems and that he was just being spiteful.  How he really didn't want to go to the first party because he dosent get along with this one guy and he really didnt want to see this other guy.  The whole time he is saying this he is yelling at me and telling me I need therapy.  Then after all that he says that we are going to the parties. 

Weekend getaway!!!

My husband and planned a weekend getaway.  We will be going to Skyline Drive in VA.  We will go down on a Friday and come back on a Monday.  I can hardly wait.  Not sure what clothes to pack.  Not sure how the weather is in the mountains specially at night.  I picked a room with a king size bed and a patio.  What I want to do the most is just walk throught the trails.  My son will be staying with his sister for the weekend.  I can hardly wait.  This will be our first paid weekend away in all the years we have been married alone.  We will be married 24 years this May. 

Do you want a credit card?

I have a question.  I would like to know who hates it when you are shopping and at the check out they ask you 50 million personal questions.  What’s your phone number, what is your email address and do you want to apply for a credit card.  Its kind of hard to say I will not shop in that store anymore, because all the stores do it now.  They push their workers to ask these question by saying if your numbers are low we will let you go.  I think as the customer we should stand stronger and say no.  You don’t need that information.  If I want to be on a mailing list I will ask you.  If I want your credit card I will ask to fill it out.  If you don’t like being asked these questions tell them.  Write the store and complain.  What if you had a stalker?  They could be in the store with you hear you give this information out and then they too would have your personal information.

New Moon

I watch the "New Moon" movie and really enjoyed it.  Since I have read the books I am in no hurry to pay to see the movie at the theater.  Waiting for it to come out on DVD is just fine with me.  I have my son hooked on the movies.  I will be reading the newest book by Stephenie Meyer. The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner: An Eclipse Novella (Twilight Saga)

It will be out in hard cover June 5.  I would love to see her continue the story where the last book left off.

Confused

Lately I have been depressed.  I am more confused then I have ever been.  I feel that going to therapy I should feel better.  But it seems the more I go the more I feel I need to work on.  What my true wish is to get me back.  I feel I lost myself somewhere.  This is not where I have planned to be.  I always felt I would have a friend who would drop by for no reason other then to say hi.  I feel I have given so much of my self to others and have not gotten that in return.  I feel that way about my job also.  The more you give the more they take.  Sometimes I just want to say f@@k the world.  When will it be my turn.  I listen to people be all the time.  The worst part of that is that when I am home I am so tried of listening I can not hear them.  That is not right.  If I am going to be really honest I am starting to not hear anyone any more.  How do you take a break from that. 

Reading

I just finished reading    " The Footprints of God : A Novel
I really enjoyed this book.  For me books are better then tv.  Its a good escape from the everyday stress.

I have to say the one problem I have with reading is that I sometimes cant finish reading it fast enough.  I find myself skipping parts that seem like they might not be important.

For me the best time for reading is in the summer.  You can sit out side enjoy the sun and still be entertained.

Foot fetish shoes

We bought a new fridge this past weekend.  For the first time we have one that dispense water and ice.  My husbands brother-in-law came over to help hook everything up.  Well I have to tell you something about our brother-in-law, he has a foot fetish. Plus he has a crush on me.  When he got to our house he says I have something for you.  It was a pair of nine west shoes.  He says he found them at a yard sale for $2.00.  He says his wife did not want any thing from him. 
But he also told me not to tell her he gave me the shoes.

Sounds a little fishy to me.Nine West Women's Rocha Platform Pump,Green Synth,10 M US

Would you wear the shoes??

The talk

I had my second session. We talked about what I wanted out of counselling and issues with my husband. I feel since he has been in counselling for over a year and only a few things have changed whats the point. Are marriage is still at a dead end. He doesn't see it that way. He thinks everything is fine and dandy. Which I don't understand. He reads into other things so much and thinks the worse of every other situation. Why does our marriage not make him worry? Any way the therapist asked me if I talk to him about what my issues are. I told her when I do say something he says OK he understands but a few days later we are back to the same old same old. So what is the point of saying anything. She thinks it may be a communication skills.
Well I tried yesterday and told him how I feel I do everything for him. I go out of my way to do things that will make him happy or do things to not get him upset. How I worry when he gets in my car that the car is not to dirty or that he wont have to fiddle with the radio to find his station. I explained that he wont even do little things for me. Unless its also something he is into also.
I guess we have to wait and see what happens.

Therapy session

Well I had my first therapy session. The first session is mostly about your family history. Then you talk a little about what you want to get out therapy. This is called your goals. As I was talking to my therapist, I realized that I have more issues that need to be address then what I thought I did. You go in thinking its not me its him. Well I need to work on me. I believe I like this therapist better then my husbands. I am looking forward to my next session. I am hoping that fixing myself will help fix my marriage.

Therapy today

I have been reading my "Excuse begone" book and was been very positive. Till, I got home one night and my husband was awake. It only took him 15 minutes to knock me on my ass. He is so full of negative thoughts. I tried so hard to keep thinking positive but the more he talked the more it just faded away. I don't know if reading this book is going to show me that I can get past his negativing thinking, or I need to leave him.
Today is his therapy appt. He suppose to ask the therapist if we can go separately to her or do we need separate therapist. I just know him going by himself is not working.

Today is a New day!!

I will day be happy. I will push all negative thoughts from my mind. I almost went negative when in my car my CD was in the radio. I was ready to start bad mouthing my husband. But instead I thought of reasons he may have taken it out. Then I called him and wished him a great day. Which I knew would make him happy. I have to remember the more negative you give the more you will get back. I need to stop it and think positive to get positive back.

Biology of Belief

I started reading "Biology of Belief". I have to admit its a little hard to understand some of what the author is saying. It has been a long time since I have study cells. I am taking it slow. I hope to talk to my friend to get a better understanding. But from what I do understand, I like. I have to read alittle more before I can start to say what the author is saying. I may have to reread what I have read so far. Hopefully by next week I should be able to give you an idea as to what he is saying.

Wayne Dryer

Its been several days since are big fight. My husband can not understand why I am mad at him. He feels we didn’t even fight. I tried to explain to him that he was doing all the screaming and yell and would not let me say a word. He just does not get it. He missed this week’s therapy appt due to being sick. He is supposed to make the next one so that both of us can attend. I am at my wits end right now and don’t what to do. If he is not fully understanding how he sounds how is he to understand what he is doing to me and our son!

I was flipping through the channels the other day and Wayne Dryer was on the PPS station talking about his book. The book is called “Excuses Be Gone”. It talked about you can accomplish anything you want if you get rid of the excuses. This really intrigued me so of course when I went to the book store to buy it they were sold out. I hope that means it’s a good book. I ordered the book and should get it by Thursday. This is one thing I do a lot is make excuses. I am not sure if I do that because I really don’t want to do what I am making excuse for or if I really don’t think I can do what I am planning. Hopefully this book will make an impact on my life